Often but not always , those who are pondering this question readily acknowledge that the Bible says a Christian cannot marry a non-Christian. Nevertheless, they believe they can move down this path because 1 the Bible does not forbid dating an unbeliever; 2 their romantic relationship can serve as a means of evangelism to the unbelieving boyfriend or girlfriend; 3 their situation is unique; or 4 a combination exists of some or all of the above. In answering the question whether a Christian can date a non-Christian, it is important to first note that the Bible, strictly speaking, does not forbid Christians from dating non-Christians. That last statement might cause a few biblically-minded Christians to stumble. What God has spoken he has spoken, and his Word is sufficient.
I am 31 and have been praying unceasingly for God to provide a christian man to me. Recently I met a muslim man who seems to be everything I have ever prayed for except of cause he is muslim. What would be the pitfalls of engaging in such a relationship. For all yyou people who are crying over where it my mate. Remember God is God and that he will come through for you you have to wait on him and be obedient. But you must pray, trust and do what He tell us to in His Word. Stop dating the sinner and start praying for God will and no ours to be done.
If the sinners in your life never come back and get saved they just were not the one for you and God has something so much better for you. Trust God and take Him at His word. Hi, I am a strong believer in God and I could think of no other place to be than in the arms of God!!
In regard to dating an unbeliever I just recently let someone go on the basis of my belief. I let him know from the start how strongly I felt about God. Instead of feeling happy to see him I felt dreadful. I hate to say it but I seen his flaws as soon as he opened his mouth. He tried to take my virginity, but I knew better than that! He got upset but I already knew it was time for him to go and me to move on.
What a ride of my life!! We go through things to experience as well as learn, and I learned there is no rush in trying to find the right one when God is trying to shape me and mold me into the woman he wants me to be. I am still pure and whole and waiting on that one man who will bring joy to my life. I am being very careful about the men that try to approach me!!!! Beware dating an unbeliever!!!
Rozetta: Thanks for your comments. We are praying for you. Thanks for your comments. Hey guys, I just broke up with my unbeliever fiance, yup, I was about to get married, but the first day at counseling the issue came up, I felt really bad because I love her so much, but my love for God is stronger, even though i did wrong, i end up living with her for a while. In regard to dating unbelievers: Hey, my best friend, who is a girl, has been dating an unbeliever for almost a year now.
I have always felt uneasy about it but have never truly voiced it. Do you think God would be selective like this? I am a guy and I used to have VERY strong feelings for her and she knows it, so I have always felt that if I brought it up, she would think I am just being selfish, and I even question myself if I am just being selfish and still want to be with her.
Is it even my place to bring it up? Hey, this is Chris from the last post with an ate. Well, I had been praying A LOT about my Christian best friend dating an unbeliever, and it turns out, she just broke up with him!
We connect in so many levels - intellectually and emotionally. I think he might be the one for me. You have to be weary. When people are in love or want somebody we can trick ourselves in to believing they are saved when there is no fruit.
But we convince ourselves that the maggot ridden apples are good fruit - they are not. Be not deceived. The only answer is to get out of that relationship and flee from it. Pray for that person but firstly you must break up with that person.
Otherwise you fall under the worst sin of all - hypocrisy. I pray for my ex now, and after a lot of sacrifice and tears, i am believing that Jehovah Jirah my provider, will work it all together for my own Good, i am on fire 4 Him again AMEN, its only a matter of time b4 im walking up the aisle to be joined together to a strong devil chasing, prayer warrior mighty man of valor, handsome, ha, amen all things are possible to him who believes, God is mighty and it is not good for a man to be alone, he designed eve for adam, and he will make a ay for me and you also.
Jesus spent most of his time being around sinners. God may have placed your bf in your life to strength your faith. Born again Christians John says we are are born of God, so how can a child of God even think about dating any body that is not born again. This is the first place that I have been to that does not make me feel worse than I already doso I will pour out everything here.
Six months ago, I met a guy who was not a christian. I fell for him the first day I met him.
Agree, remarkable dating an unbeliever christian think, that
Before you know it we were boyfriend and girlfriend and were sleeping together. Almost as bad as not being a christian, he treated me awful. Now it has been about six months. I was writing in my Journal all along about what a bad idea this was, but i kept ahead with it. I just recently stopped talking to him about 80 hours ago.
I broke up with a christian before this non-saved guy who was just not on the same page with me, and was really upset about it and depressed. I had been celibate 5. I lost everything so quickly. I was am? It is as if something has taken over me. I went from being this confident leader in so many cts in my church to this lump of a person who can barely see what God has for her anymore. One who is a Christian, and who has it together. I am in my late twenties, and even though that is not oldI want to be married.
I know that I can be alone, but I am so tired of being alone.
If you are one of the many Christian singles dating unbelievers, save yourself additional troubles by getting out of the dating relationship as soon as possible. At the very least, the vast majority of Christians who date unbelievers or unsaved singles experience loss of sexual purity, loss of fellowship with the Lord and other believers, and heartache. I never would have considered dating a non-Christian. Not in a million years. In fact, "loves God and puts Him first" was always on the top of the list of what I was looking for. But then the frustration set in. It started as impatience, but it soon developed into a rampaging beast of . One could certainly ask, "If a Christian cannot marry an unbeliever, why would they ever date one?" That is a good question! I think one can have a friendship relationship with an unbeliever of the opposite sex, without entering into a dating relationship. Within the context of a friendship relationship, the Gospel can surely be shared.
I feel like God is playing some sort of trick on me. I am thankfully not too heart broken, but I am sad that I am craving this man, and not craving the Lord like I used to. I am too afraid to talk to my friends from church, or even my pastor that I am close to and definitely not my mom or dad.
I know it is a trick of the enemy but I am still scared. I am depressed, I cry all the time, I have thoughts about suicide a lot, and this was even before the sexual relationship- they have just intensified since then. Please help me. And I also want to get married soon, so that I can stop feeling like a big sinner.
This is an area of pure defeat for me. I feel like I can control everything else, but not this. Every time I give it to the Lord, even after years, it comes back to haunt me. It is depressing me. I am not free. Please help. Wow, there is so much I want to say to you. First of all, I identify with so much that you have said. It appears that God is doing the same work in many of His children. I also feel honored that you would trust us where you would not trust others, so I want to be faithful with that and not disappoint you.
I hope it makes you feel better to know that others have been there, and are going through the same thing. And I want to find a way to comunicate with you directly because I do have so much to say. Make sure you give yourself a pat on the back for this! In this way journalling you are owning the situation, and processing through it, and also validating yourself.
Whatever is happening in your life good or bad, you know that you are worth enough to put it all on paper. Maybe all the journalling is the reason why. Like me, this could make you a professional writer one day! It will also get you through college a lot easier than others, so good for you!
The rest of what you wrote is difficult to address. Perhaps the answers for you are different than for me. That thing we were made for? Is God playing tricks, does He really love me? He said He would give us the desires of or heart, when! Why not now! Again Wandering, there are no easy answers. I know you will find peace and comfort here. Above everything else you will find your relationship with God is better than anything else in the world.
Let me make a suggestion that may really help you. Do you know any married people? Have you ever seen them fight? Worry about bills, or have concerns about their kids? Have you heard them say they were depressed or suicidal? I have seen all of the above. Are you aware of what God may be saving you from? Maybe you think like me, sometimes you would give everything you have just for a fight with your spouse.
But I think you and I will have that soon enough. In the mean time, I believe the closer you get to God, the less important marriage will be to you, and you will be able to focus on all the important things in your life right now, like school, and Christian service, and other things which you may not have mentioned here. We single ladies think marriage is really important, among other things, because our culture idolizes it.
As believers we have more wisdom. Sex and marriage are not everything. We just have to make sure we are not acting like the world. II Cor. Remember Wandering, we have been redeemed from this. For the world sex may be the best thing they have. We have a greater hope! You have a greater future than to be united with a man who treats you bad.
And because of your faith thankfully, you were able to get out of that painful relationship, where you were less for just a moment than God sees you as. Praise God! There are a lot of ladies going through the same things that you are, including myself. Please stay in touch. I really appreciate you. And I affirm how valuable you are to God and His kingdom. Let God come in and give you new life as it passes away. But many of us in the kingdom, married and single have times that we feel life is too hard to live.
You are not alone. I know you will come out of this victorious, if you have not already. May I recommend you read through all of II Corinthians? I will read through it with you. I know you will be so blessed, and I will too. Anyone reading this post, please feel free to join us.
I know actually what you are going through. It seems that every guy i meet is only interested in one thing mostly unbelievers. They are mostly married by my age. It seems the closer I inch towards thirtymy desire to be a wife and a mother is getting glimpser by the moment. The last guy i was involved with who claimed to be saved only wanted to use me for sex and unfortunently i gave in ,but to only get hurt AGAIN.
His ex -girlfriend moved in with him and he pretty much dumped me. I feel completely hopeless. Unmarried, have a child and one parent recently became saved. They dated less than a year, got pregnant and have been on and off for several years now.
They are discussing the possibility of reuniting but I fear that now that one is a believer and one is not that it would be extremely difficult. Hello everyone. I just wanted to leave a word of encouragement to those who find it hard wainting for the right person from God. I am 34 and single, I have seen Him work mightily in other areas of my life and simply know that somehow, some day, he will provide.
I was once engaged to a girl who had some ct of her character that were not compatible with a Christian lifestyle. I was aware of it but secretely wished that she would somehow change. I managed to convince myself that God has a plan for that, but I eventually came to face the truth and had to break up, leaving a lot of scars on both sides. I later realised that it is not honest to claim to love someone when you secretely wish them to change.
I know it is a tough decision to make because most of us want to have someone on our side to share things with. We already received salvation by grace Ephbut we must show ourselves worthy of it and demonstrate the fruit of salvation James Waiting upon God is a fruit of the Spirit. Who do you want to become?
I have a close friend who was a very committed christian she was looking for a partner inthe christian community although she is pretty and a nice person.
After pain and suffering in the church she met the nicest guy ever true they did sleep together but are now happily married and he comes to church as well. I have had many opportunities to date non christians and have stayed committed this has got me nowwhere. I am 33 and if a meet a guy i like i will date him regardless of faith.
Besides theres no difference in the behaviour of christians and non christians many beat their wives or have affairs. My name is monica and 20 years old and engaged.
I was in storm for a while with my partner. We were fighting and arguing. Beacuse I was putting him first and not god, which was wrong. Things were really bad and i was feeling unloved and not cared for.
I was getting bads thoughts in my head, I thought he was cheating on me and getting supions. It was getting too much. One of my christains friends help me to get right with god again. Now I put god first and then him things are looking up. I need some advice. Thank you. To live for him and not for self! Hello all singles, Well I am 31 years old and a believer who has been through the hurdles. I do ask myself the question why am I so desparate to get too intimate and sometimes I am eager to start or give unsave men a chance in my life.
It is always imperative to share these issues with someone who can provide spiritual guidance through Christ to help lead us back on track. Therefore in all fairness may the Lord help us to wait because his best is yet to come.
Singles let us save yourselves from unnecessary pain which come from impatience and desparation to get intimate. Stand firm.
May God ever keep us holy until He is ready to disclose our mate or bless us otherwise. Hey everyone. I am 18 years of age and i have recieved the gift of salvation god has certainly worked wonders in my life.
I have had to push so many bad influences out of my life. But i did so i gave that problem up to god and he helped me through it to me friendship is gods gift of having good faith for he has a gift for each person touched. But i have recently became hurt in a situation and i dont know how to react that well to it. I was fine with it until he started to date and spend his time with a unbeliever its not forbidden but god says we give guidance to them but not date them.
If he just started giving his life with the lord. How could he do that to me? I need guidance because i dont understand!! Not all nonbelievers will try to take your virginity away.
I am a virgin and girl i gotta say you seem like you ride your horse a little tooo high. YOu need to calm down there. You are no better than the unbeliever. God will look at you no different if you keep feeling as if you are better than them.
If a man respects you it doesnt matter whether he believes or not. No wonder there are more divorces and less marriages, cohabiting couples, singles parents and so on. This nation and the world will have more single people who will all die alone. This is a really random thing to do, but I am a non-christian girl in a relationship with a christian boy that is starting to struggle with my lack of faith. I came to this place looking for some insight, and am a little upset with the lack of tolerance for, and the way non-christian people are referred too.
I dont want to corrupt anyone, I dont want to interfere with anyones commitment to God, im just in love. We are in love. I dont feel mature enough to commit to a belief system at this point in my life. But i dont want to lose him, he has inspired me to change, to look at my life differently, to be better. Im struggling for an answer.
I ask myself should I give in and go along with his beliefs and turn to Christianity? Or maybe I should try and explain him my views and see if he likes me enough to try and make this work as it is. I find it interesting that people online seem much less open to Non-Christians than in real life. I think you should just talk this through with your guy and see if you can reach a compromise.
Just ask yourself if you really love him, and then figure out how fare are you ready to go in a compromise. For you to respect his beliefs and for him to understand what you two have and what it means to him. He will get more distant the longer you are together if you do not at. If they are compatible then you have a chance at a future. That is a fact in the long run.
As a non-Christian. I would like to say I am rather offended by some of presumptions written above. I am attracted to a Christian girl I know and fully respect all her decisions and lifestyle options.
I lead my life to be as morally pure as possible, as this is what I feel to be the most important thing in life. Hey, I need help!!!
We have been together for 4 months. Because of that breakup, I found myself back on track with my faith and loving God more than ever. He has blessed me in so many ways with that breakup.
I made it clear many times that I would only date believers but he still persisted, like on Valentines Day, he left a teddy bear and a bag of Hot Cheetos my fave.
Then a few weeks ago when the California Supreme Court rejected gay marriage, he was super-pissed and we were on the phone talking about it then started talking about religion, and he told me that he could never EVER believe in God or become a Christian, and that if he would ever go back to a religion, it would be Catholicism, which he grew up with. He grew up in a devoutly Catholic family, went to church and did all those traditions, but as a teen started experimenting with all these other religions.
He was at one point a Christian and believed in God, but never really felt His presence so strayed away because he never really believed. Then he became a hardcore Atheist, and it was only recently he became Agnostic. He is very respectful of different beliefs though, even more so than other Christians, which I love about him. And he thinks love is the only thing that matters in a romantic relationship but God IS love!
I really want out because I was so much happier single and I was on fire for the Lord. But I have so many fears in my head. Also, he is actually more selfless and sacrificial than most Christians, and has done so much for me we drove all the way from Sacramento where we live to SF to see my best friend and we dropped her off 30 minutes away from SF, and he did ALL of the driving.
He got us tickets to see All American Rejects, one of my fave. He treats me soooo well. Especially when you desire a loving relationship. We fell in love. Thankfully, we are still friends. I ended up sleeping with an old friend of mine to try and heal the heartbreak.
Jan 02, Having any kind of intimate relationship with an unbeliever can quickly turn into something that is a hindrance to your walk with Christ. We are called to evangelize the lost, not be intimate with them. There is nothing wrong with building quality friendships with unbelievers, but that is as far as it should go. If you are already married to an unbeliever, then you need to love him/her as best you can, set a good example of being a Christian, and pray for your spouse's salvation. You cannot leave your spouse (unless there is physical abuse, adultery, or if you are abandoned). You need to stick it out.
Meanwhile, she hooked up with another guy for the same reason. It lasted a month. We had missed each other so much and ended up sleeping together again.
Stupid again! Anyway, the feelings of heartbreak came flooding back. I wonder what I was doing dating her. Am I crazy? I feel like an idiot compromising my faith for the sake of falling in love with what I now believe was the wrong woman.
We will always be friends and I do hope that she will change one day. He knows the desires of our hearts. Amen to that. I feel so lonely now and all i want to do is to settle down and have a family to card for. If they bolt, then great. If they want to know more, then great. If they want to keep seeing you and they want to learn more about your faith, then what the harm are you doing?
My experience is.
Confirm. dating an unbeliever christian opinion you
I tell them off the bat my beliefs. YOU planted the seed. You should enjoy being single. ENJOY the missionary dating scene. We all know that. Unbelievers like to point the finger and call us hypocrites if they know of any of our trespasses. You are just going to have to deal with that.
Sep 17, And if it is, I don't care if the person is a believer or an unbeliever, Christian or non-Christian. You can date a Christian and be sinning. You can date a non-Christian and be sinning because your affections or your love or your need for that person might reflect that God doesn't have a place in your life nearly as big and powerful and satisfying and beautiful as he ought to have in your life. May 29, Nevertheless, they believe they can move down this path because (1) the Bible does not forbid dating an unbeliever; (2) their romantic relationship can serve as a means of evangelism to the unbelieving boyfriend or girlfriend; (3) their situation is unique; or (4) a combination exists of some or all of the above. You can't date a non-Christian without asking this question. Your relationship with God should always come first, before your relationship with a potential spouse. If this relationship will have a.
But, God will use our mistakes to His advantage. Believe that.
God makes a way. Let Him use you in your life. Every time you meet someone, say God please use me. YOU are on a mission!!! I have just recently experienced a similar situation with an unbeliever who I shared a mutual attraction with.
After dating for several months even with his being consistent in church attendance I never saw a genuine interest in the Word of God or the things of God, just church attendance. We may not always understand the tryings of our faith or the things that we feel or why we feel them, but we can be assured that God does not contradict his word. Feelings change, but the word of God does not. In the end you will see that! Disregarding these feelings however, I am now in a relationship. The fact is, he and God are the most special things in my life at the moment and to think that they are both so seperate is causing many tears on my part, and little understanding on his.
I just got done dating a catholic. He believed in the Trinity, etc. I started the relationship telling him I did not believe in sex before marriage or in dating an unbeliever, but he said he believed. We started to slip towards sex, and I told him we needed to slow down. But the sarcasm kept coming up. Three times, almost once a month. And each time I told him he was mocking me.
How do you explain that to an unbeliever, how can they share that joy with you? I would always wonder if he was just going to church for me, and how would he raise our kids. Well, we broke up. They are a curse to us, and we are a curse to them, straight up! But I had to go through this to understand why God says what He says.
Hope this helps someone. Just want to share My current bf used to be a non-believer. We were together for 6 mnths then we broke up because of our different beliefs. Somehow, God touched his heart and he now trusts the Lord and has become a christian. He converted because he truely believes God and God has been quite real in his life. I just wish to encourage u guys to pray for ur other half.
I started liking this girl thats an athiest, she doesnt understand why i told her we couldnt be together. Ive tried to explain it to her but its just not working. She says that i should be with someone who makes me happy, which she does. Ah so much. I dont know how i can explain to her why i cant be with her.
I need help and guidence. I am extremely discouraged and frustrated. I know im not supposed to date an unbeliever, but i want to know why. I mean i know its not a good idea and there could be some major conflicts, but i am looking for a straight reason to why God doesnt want believers dating unbelievers?
Dating an unbeliever christian
You are absolutely right. We can never give up or stop praying for our non beleiver family, friends, or signigicant others. Jesus made the ultimate sacrifice while we were still sinners. Prayer is one of the most powerful tools we have.
Is It Sinful to Date a Non-Christian? // Ask Pastor John
I can understand the difficulties you are having with your bf sexually. This is a major change in lifestyle to what he has always known. Encourage him that the reward will be great, in your relationship and more importantly in his personal relationship with God. Every Christian woman I have dated has forced me to have sexual relations with her. Also they have all cheated on me or have cheated on their boyfriends with me.
What am I to do? You look and judge all the time, I hate it! Christians want me to hate myself before God will accept me, I call BS on that! I thought unequally yoked was a king james version, which means god didnt write it or preach it, get a hold of yourself and stop lying to the people.
God loves all, and he wants us all to be happy, whether we have the same beliefs or not. Lest not be hypocrites! You are clearly very angry.
You have run into some people that were not a good representation of Christianity. Anyone who has judged you is going against a very basic Christian principal. The only question I have for you is, if you feel so betrayed by Christians than why did you decide to come to a Christian website?
I am hoping that the answer is that in your heart God has touched you. You can feel this and you are yearning to be close to Him. You are in the Spirit; they are in the flesh Rom. You are a slave to righteousness; they are a slave to sin Rom. You are led by the Spirit; they are led by the god of this world Rom.
For dating an unbeliever christian can suggest
You are alive in Christ; they are dead in sin Eph. None of these spiritual realities can be a cause for boasting see Lukefor you did not achieve these things by your will power or intelligence. You are a Christian by sheer grace 1 Cor. Nevertheless, the fact remains that you are, at a basic level, different from each other and therefore unable to share true intimacy in marriage. Furthermore, there are countless testimonies of men and women who have married unbelievers who, after years of struggle, say that it was an unwise decision.
Apologise, dating an unbeliever christian were visited
Why, then, would you ponder the possibility of dating an unbeliever? The question we often fail to ask is, unique to what? Unique in the sense that things will turn out different?
Unique in the sense that somehow you are exempt from obedience in this case? Any assumption that connects exemption from obedience to particular circumstances is usually a sign that you are in the throes of self-deception. Unique in the sense that no one has ever been faced with this kind of decision?
No, this temptation, like all others, is one that is common to man 1 Cor. The truth is that your situation is not unique at all. But you must remember that God has not pitted his commandments against each other. In other words, the instruction is clear: you cannot marry an unbeliever. You must learn to obey the Lord, trust that his commandments are good and harmonious, and that he is sovereign over your boyfriend or girlfriend.
It is not ultimately up to you whether your boyfriend or girlfriend is saved. Pray for the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest Matt.
So, is it wrong to date an unbeliever? In light of the above principles, I find it difficult to see how a believer can enter into a dating relationship with an unbeliever-a relationship that is romantic by nature and designed to lead to marriage-in faith. Although the Bible does not address the dating question specifically, it does tell us that everything we do in the Christian life must be done in faith; that is, everything we do must be carried out with a good conscience and be something for which we can thank God.
Whatever is not of faith, Paul reminds us, is sin Rom. You may fear loneliness and the potential of never being married. I get that. But a good conscience and a happy walk with Christ is infinitely better than what grasping at romance will get us.
Is Sex Before Marriage a Sin? Should you:. Genesis 2 fleshes this out more. Therefore, marriage is a partnership. God did not create man alone to be competent to fulfill his calling to image God. He created man and woman in relationship to do that.
So, in a Christian marriage, marriage is a partnership in the gospel. Conversely, marrying a non-Christian necessarily makes marriage a partnership in something else. Genesis 3 shows how us how marriage gets messed up by sin. Adam and Eve go from naked and unashamed to hiding from one another. In the curse, God pronounces how marriage post-Fall is a battle of one sinful will against another:.
When marrying a non-Christian, you lose out on the blessing of having a spouse who calls you to submit your will to Christ, and instead have a spouse who has no interest in being called to submit their own will to Christ. In the rest of Genesis, we see a huge effort made to ensure the people of God would only marry those who trust the Lord.
In Genesis -9, Hamor invites the sons of Jacob to intermarry with the daughters of Shechem a town that has just proved its character in the mistreatment of Dinah. To intermarry with this town rather than distance themselves from such defilement would have been the ultimate compromise; it would have destroyed the people of God in the first generation.
Do not intermarry with them. This prohibition is repeated in Joshuaand the trajectory of intermarriage never assumes or expects the Canaanites would end up being converted. Intermarriage is also the downfall of kings: even the super-wise Solomon 1 Kings 11 and most obviously Ahab 1 Kings On the other hand, if a foreigner was already converted, then there was absolutely no prohibition against marrying them. In fact, this is seen as a positive Zipporah, Rahab, Ruth.
Positively, Proverbs 31 calls the young man to look out for a woman of noble character. The climax of the poem, and the source of everything noble about her, is reached in verse What is it that would most attract you to a potential spouse: charm, beauty, or fear of the Lord?
He provides and protects; she trusts and takes godly initiative. In the New Testament, there are a number of asides that make it clear this Old Testament prohibition still stands. A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives.