I met my boyfriend through a more alternative, smaller site, and I never would have found him on eHarmony. But online dating is so common now that even the most alternative types can be found on OKCupid. But it never worked, and probably made me look either desperate, or uncaring. I never gave the man enough of a chance to show me that he was interested, and that, of course, made it harder to figure out who really was interested. Ruby, same here. What on earth gives. EMK is right on the ball about men looking for sex and finding love, and women looking for love and finding sex.